Winter Funtime Thoughts

I just noticed that I have a canoe in back of my apartment. I think I should be concerned that the first thought that came to mind was not "Why is there a canoe in my backyard?" or "How did that canoe get there?" but instead it was "I bet that fucker would fly if I waxed the bottom and used it as a sled at Elver Park!" immediately followed by "How the fuck am I going to get it there?" and "I'm gonna need a lot of booze for this!"

Note that there's no concern for who the owner of said canoe is, and whether it'd be missed.